I know many of you have been hanging by a thread since my last post, wondering what the most requested service is over here at Mistress J Studios, in San Jose, California. Well, since it is the holiday season, I’ll tell you.
What is pegging some of you ask? It is getting poked in the butt with a rubber dong that is strapped around my hips.
It is amazing how many men desire the ultimate in role reversal. Remember that saying “It is better to give than to receive” ? My clients and I tend to agree, as I REALLY enjoy giving it good to a guy and having him take it like a girl!
The anus has thousands of nerve endings, thus making it a pleasurable experience when done right. Here is a link to Bliss Connection’s blog on 9 Tips For pain Free Anal Sex.
Pegging often goes deeper than just pleasure. I hear over and over, how my cis-gendered male clients want to give up control, to be taken, to surrender. Because of anatomy, even if they identify as submissive, their penis demands that they penetrate, and in most cases, move their hips.
In pegging, the boy and the girl trade places. She gives, he receives.
I love it. I am the one who controls the warm-up, the pace, the depth and the position. I tease and deny. I teach. Often, I will instruct my client to try a slow teasing technique the next time he has PIV sex. Certain positions give him a chance to feel leg fatigue, a common occurrence with the Cowgirl pose. When the man wants to jump right into the pounding, I hold him back, reminding him who’s in charge, and dictate the pace.
I see what the male sees, and he sees what the female sees. Pegging leaves me exhausted, and him often energized. Does this sound familiar folks? In this role reversal, the female gets a taste of how the man feels and what he does. They do a lot of work ladies!
Please don’t think for a minute that straight men who like pegging are secretly gay. It’s not about that at all. A straight man is not gay if he wants to be pegged by a woman.
In our deeply misogynistic culture, men are raised with the fear of being labeled as someone who acts like a woman. How dreadful is that! (sarcasm) I mean, what man wants to be like a girl? Isn’t the man supposed to in charge of sex?
Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian, authors of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners, claim “straight men who get into anal penetration are among the most secure in their masculinity: because they’ve examined themselves, faced their fears.”
They go on to say “The idea that penetration is an act of dominance is almost certainly tied in to sexism and the notion that the woman’s role is inferior. Plenty of men have absorbed these ideas at a subconscious level. Even if a man doesn’t think it is an act of dominance when he penetrates his (male or female) partner, he may still hesitate to switch roles because he is afraid that it will mean losing his masculinity if he takes a turn catching instead of pitching.”
We’re steeped in a culture of prescribed sexual roles for men and women, so it’s a thrill to break the “rules”. I see a man enjoying the feeling of vulnerability he’s not accustomed to. The taboo of being penetrated is (for some) is what is exciting. Yes, it feels good, but here is a respectable, Dockers wearing, alpha man being bent over my couch and taking it in the a**. He has given up control and all he can do is spread his cheeks and smile. How fun for him!
And fun for me too. There is a feeling of power and responsibility for me. This man trusts me with his most valuable assets, (pun intended) his body and his dignity. And I take that role very seriously. I always start off gentle…
Since sexism goes both ways, one of the reasons pegging desired so often here is because my clients want it, but can’t get it at home. Many say their gal thinks it’s silly or emasculating. I think that attitude is what is silly. What can be more manly than a man feeling comfortable enough with his partner and share his deepest desires, whatever they are? And one where she can express and explore hers?
Pegging breaks convention, it liberates, it connects. And it feels good.
Just to be clear, Mistress J believes in consent from both parties, and one should never do anything that is not to their liking or something they find distasteful just to please another person.
Intrigued? Contact me.
If you are curious about pegging and Feminine Domination, I invite you to contact me for a session in my San Jose studio.
Mistress J Studios is a sex positive studio that provides a safe place for personal expression. Nude male photography, male and female submission, cross dressing and gender bending are welcomed and encouraged here.
My email is firstname.lastname@example.org. I am in San Jose, California. I look forward to hearing from you. 408-896-5836.